April 2nd, 2017
Either I’m going to kill my husband for lying or whatever’s growing in his mouth will do it for me. God only knows what that s**t gave him on the night he didn’t come home, but I’ll be damned if I’ll let him go to the doctor for it. The last thing our family needs is the nurses down at that clinic talking about how Jerry’s been f*****g around on me again. I’ve got leftover penicillin from the infection he gave me two years ago. He can have that.
Listen, I know I sound cruel, but Jerry’s on thin ice. Two weeks ago, he claimed he was “coming home from the bar” and all of a sudden he “woke up in the woods 15 hours later.” His truck was in a ditch on the side of the road. I called bullshit immediately. Here’s what I know had to have happened: he was drunk, he picked up some chick at The Rooster, and they went into the woods to f**k. And now he caught something. Again.
Last time this happened – when he swore it’d never happen again, mind you – it took a good long time for me to forgive him. He begged for another chance, so I gave it to him. But now I’m fed up. I’m not going to divorce him, but this is the last straw. He can sleep on the couch for the next 30 years for all I care.
And that’s where he’s been. On the couch.
Here’s the issue: he does have something wrong with his mouth. That little s**t he was with must’ve given him something awful because the glands under his tongue are swollen pretty badly. He doesn’t seem to be in much pain, but he slurs when he talks.
I’m thinking I might cave and let him go to the clinic the next county over, but he’s only been taking the penicillin for a few days. I think that stuff can take weeks to finally kick in, so he’ll have to suck it up. A little penance for thinking with his dick.
April 6th, 2017
Jerry’s mouth is nasty. The swelling started to go down but the color under his tongue looks bad. It’s bright red and the veins are really prominent. His breath could kill a horse, too. The guys at his job are making fun of him for catching something; he doesn’t even try to defend himself about it anymore.
I almost feel bad for him when I hear all the tossing and turning on the couch while I’m trying to sleep. He’s had some terrible nightmares since that night. Must be all the guilt. Well, he should feel guilty. God knows he would’ve given me what he got if I didn’t realize he’d been gone all night. He would’ve just rolled on top of me like everything was alright and we’d both be in the same situation. No thank you!
April 9th, 2017
Something popped under Jerry’s tongue overnight and there’s yellow slime all over our pretty couch. He said he’s very sorry and spent the morning trying to clean it off, but something tells me we’ll be getting a new sofa before the year is out.
The left side under his tongue isn’t swollen anymore and Jerry’s thinking about lancing the other side tonight, but now all he does is complain that the roof of his mouth is starting to hurt. I don’t even want to think about what he did with that girl that night.
April 10th, 2017
I woke up to the sound of Jerry screaming. I ran downstairs and found him, stark naked, staring out the sliding glass doors that lead to the backyard. There was a terrible mess all over the floor and couch. The other area of swelling under his tongue must’ve popped either by itself or with help from him, because there was that yellow stuff everywhere and it was mixed with blood.
I’ll admit, this was the first time I was actually worried about him. It wasn’t the blood or the goo, but it was how he kept screaming even after I turned the light on and how he just stared out that door. To make matters worse, he’d fingerpainted these things all over the glass. They looked like they could have been people, but the proportions were all off. I don’t think I’d ever been scared of a stick figure until right then.
I went over and unlocked the liquor cabinet and poured him a big drink. He took it from me and started to calm down after a few sips. It was the first drink I let him have since that night he didn’t come home. I think he must’ve had a beer or two after work in between now and then, but I haven’t seen him even buzzed. He’s been trying to be a good boy. It’s gonna take more than that.
April 12th, 2017
I guess the penicillin did the job because the swelling in his mouth is all gone but he still says the roof hurts. He’s talking normally now and after that little scare last night, he slept like a baby. Good thing he’s off work today – he got to sleep in.
We even watched a movie together after dinner. I could see his mouth moving as he poked his tongue around inside. Yuck.
April 24th, 2017
Something really terrifying happened last night. I’m trying to convince myself it was a nightmare but now I’m here in the hospital waiting to hear whether or not my husband will be okay. I was sleeping and this super bright light started shining outside. Jerry started hollering right away and I jumped out of bed, but everything felt slow, like I was still asleep and trying to walk through deep water. Jerry screamed and screamed. As hard as I tried to move, everything took forever. By the time I got to the top of the stairs, I thought I saw shadows moving along the walls. Weird shapes and figures that reminded me of those things Jerry drew on the window that morning. None of it made sense.
Jerry’s screams got drowned out by a loud, low humming that made the windows rattle. I got really dizzy and felt like I was going to fall, but when I tried to steady myself I realized I couldn’t move at all. I was pinned in a standing position at the top of the steps.
The low sound stopped and Jerry’s shrieking filled my ears again. It sounded different this time. Muffled. The lights stopped and I regained control of my body. I stumbled down the stairs toward my husband, took one look at him, and called 911.
Ever since I arrived at the hospital with him, I’ve been trembling. Whenever I blink, I still see it moving in his mouth. Trying to get out.
Will be continued.